Untouchable.

There is always one person from your past whom is untouchable.

Untouchable because you thought you could be there for each other, but couldn't. Untouchable because you tried your best to make things work, but it seemed impossible. Untouchable because you thought they were your destination, but turns out that it was just a stopover.

Reminiscing the beginning, everything fitted so nicely. You had endless conversations, you couldn't get enough of their presence and everything just seemed to be happening for a reason.

But one day, all of a sudden, things went downhill. You didn't value each other like before anymore. You didn't make time for each other like you did in the beginning. And things went out of hand, you felt like you were losing what you had. The foundation that you built on, it was slowly breaking into bits and pieces. As this went on, you realised that it wasn't worth holding on anymore.

Then, you let go.

You let go not because you stopped loving each other. Not because you no longer care. And certainly not because you’ve lost the touch. But because leaving will do you good. It will bring both of you to a better place. And possibly, the next person who comes along, he or she will be someone of your dreams.

Yet, this person never leaves; because those feelings for them do not get lost, they just wander.

And, there may come a day where you realize that you could still pick things up from where you left off. However, like assembling the shattered pieces of a broken vase, it won't look whole anymore.

There, you'd realise that this person who was the soul to your heart, becomes untouchable; where words could only be spoken through tears.

My love, you formed such an important part of my life, yet we're so far apart. But I'm glad that you were part of it, because i wouldn't want to spend those times any other way.

We always knew that it was tough moving forward, but it was even tougher trying to make things work. While it was easier to stop hurting each other, because we deserve magic and nothing less.

A Letter To My Children In The Future.

Darlings, here are Mom’s promises to you:

I promise that I will be there to witness every step while you grow and become a person filled with passion, love and dreams. 

I promise to never stop supporting and encouraging you when you’re making life’s toughest decisions. I’ll be there; through your stressful college periods, and getting you through those pre-marriage anxieties. 

I promise that when life gets tough, home will always be your shelter from all storms. Because Mom will always be the person whom you can fall back on, and that i’ll be backing you up at all costs.

And I promise that I will be the person hearing you out when you need someone to talk to. Although I might not be able to give you the best advice or be your best listening ear, but I hope to be the person relieving you from the complicated world. 

Sure, one day you will find your very own sweetheart like I did, I know you will. And there will come a day when you would no longer need me like you do when you were younger. But remember that I’ll always be here, and i’ll always love you.

With all my heart. xx

Thank You Mum.

You are one strong and passionate woman who never lets opportunities slip away. You have big dreams and limitless ambitions; often too much that suffocates me.

But, you love us. You love us with all your heart.

And if you ever see this, this is what i’d say to you:

Mum, I want you to know that I love you too, I really do.

But, you might not like hearing this. When I was younger, there never seem to be a thing I do that you’d approve of. I felt that I constantly needed validation from you.

I hated it because it made me felt weak. Inferior. And your words of disapproval are the last things that I needed to hear when I failed; in times when I lacked encouragement.

Truth is, after all these years, we still never really agreed on things. But, I am thankful. Because if not for you, those criticisms would be coming from others. If not for you, I wouldn’t be what I am today.

So, thank you mum.
Thank you for building a strong woman.
Thank you for teaching me that life is always about the chase.
Thank you for shaping my confidence.
Thank you for my independence.
Thank you for everything that I am.

Today, I am thankful because I no longer seek validation from others. I no longer try to please everyone by being what I’m not. I no longer try to seek a common ground with everyone. Because all of us are different, all of us have different values and opinions.

And because of you, I’d grown to be opinionated. I learnt to be contented. I learnt to be confident in what I do and choose. I stuck close to my values. With that, I am happy to be pursuing my passions in life.

I hope you are proud of me, because all that I am today, I owe it to you Mum. Thank you.

Love,
Your beloved daughter

Goodbye Isn’t Forever, Or Is It?

During a recent trip, I was told a beautiful love story.

Like novels, it is amazing how two people can find their way back to each other even after decades. But what’s harder to imagine are the milestones they missed out in each other’s lives.

I asked myself repeatedly,

“How did they do it? How can they stand being apart if they meant so much to each other?”

“Did everything stayed the same?”

“And why didn’t they try to work things out in the beginning?”

Then, I came to the realization that two people often needed to be apart to know the importance of each other. And despite all the time they were apart, they still loved like before and this time, they knew that they want to stay. They knew that they are each other’s pillar of support.

Often, many don’t get second chances after losing what they had. And those who did, did not take on that chance.

But I’m glad they did.

Because when they met again in the future, they were finally ready for each other. Indeed.

It was heartbreaking yet rejoicing because he thought his love was too much for her. He thought that she could only find her happiness without him in the picture.

It was only till they found each other again, they then realised that certain things didn’t change; people might change and feelings do fade, but when the love is real, it never really goes away.

Their love story was so inspiring that I hope that the world could hear it. I hope that you, too, can be inspired by it and do not let go of the people who matter to you.

They were lucky to have found love again. But how often do chances like these happen?

So, if they do matter to you, tell them. Appreciate them today. Don’t wait till it gets too late. Don’t wait for second chances to appear.

Because they might be gone, forever.

I Want To Chase Sunsets With You.

Sunsets are one of the most beautiful things in the world. They signify the end, but also celebrates the beginning of something new.

And love, you are my sunrise and sunset.

When i see you, all i picture is us walking down the aisle together, hand in hand. You, my love, gave me everything that no one else could; your gentle touch, humor, patience and thoughtfulness.

After all these time, I couldn’t be more thankful for what I have.

Thank you for allowing me to be myself.
Thank you for supporting my dreams.
Thank you for chasing after your own passion.
Thank you for working hard for us.
Thank you for being silly with me.
Thank you for staying through our worst and best.
Thank you for being who you said you are.

Thank you, for handing me a fortune that no money can buy.

And now, i want to chase sunsets with you. Because with every sunset, it comes sunrise. Like our love, it begins all over again everyday. So when the day ends, we can renew our love when the sun rises.

Sweetheart, I look forward to every beginning with you. Because not a single moment is dull when we are together.

I love you, and I love sunsets with you.

He’s Like A Storm, But Calming.

He wasn’t supposed to be a part of you. From the very beginning, you knew he was trouble to your soul. Yet, you couldn’t fight it and you opened your heart to him.

All these while, you’ve built a wall inside your heart. But he, the heart to your soul, self-destructed at the sight of him. And so, you were convinced that you’re ready to do this; to start anew.

Especially the day he came knocking on your doors, it felt like skies were cleared from the grey and the moon shone brighter than before.

Together, you began planning for the future; Marriage. Kids. Pets. Everything. Both of you were perfect with the same dreams and goals for what the future may bring.

Day by day, you spent moments cuddling and waking up next to each other, but it was still never enough. You couldn’t believe what was in front of you, because never have you thought that you’d meet someone like him. Charming. Romantic. Intelligent. Everything was so perfect; so close to perfection indeed.

When he appeared in your life, you thought you finally found the one; your lifetime companion.

He, too, said he wanted you badly. But just when you thought you could take a step further, he backed out. He decided that you were too much for him, too much for his world. He decided to let you go.

Like all other lovers, he was like the light at the end of the tunnel, but never did you know that you got the wrong exit.

Suddenly, all the late nights spent together became memories that haunted you every second. You are lost. Confused. You aren’t sure if you’d be able to deal with this, without breaking yourself.

But I hope it wouldn’t take you long before you go back to where you were. Though broken, but this time round, you will become stronger. You will love better. You will find your worth.

And soon enough, you will find someone who looks you in the eye and say “you’re worth the wait.

Read This If Your Family Broke Apart.

Fret not. Even if things doesn’t seem fine for you right now, they will be. One day, you would understand that your parents did everything they could to save their marriage and your family from breaking apart. But, there is only so much that they can do and it is often for the better.

Looking back, most of your time may be spent watching them having endless arguments. Anger. Disagreement. Violence. It must have been unpleasant to witness. Yet, there was nothing that you could do to help.

Gradually, you felt like no one could understand the circumstances you’re facing in your life, and neither could they think in your shoes. There, you started building an indestructible wall, so that you could save yourself from explanations and what not.

But soon enough, you realized that you are suppressing all your emotions by putting up a strong front, so that no one could see through your heart.

Well, people thought you were difficult. Withdrawn. Unfriendly. But in fact, you just needed your own space, so that no one will have to be bothered by your struggles.

Now, I want you to know that it is okay to talk about it. It is okay to allow yourself to let loose, share your fears and anxieties. Do not be afraid to open up.

I also need you to know that things will fall into place eventually, and everything will start afresh. Because then, you will see that everyone is in a better place. Happier.

I understand that there may be times of reminiscent, when you felt like you lost it all; all the good times you had as a family. But i want you to continue fighting for yourself, and that you’ll never let this bring you down.

Because you should never lose faith. Don’t allow yourself to.